If we go 0-4, Tom is going to lose his mind, even more so
Mike Bayley
TRILLIUM– It was a wonderful back and forth game between the SweatSox and Rockets last Monday night at the Trill, that saw the Rockets pick up their first dub of the year after a 9-6 win over the “hometown” Sox.
Unfortunately, we only got to play a 6-inning game, thanks in part to the early Irish-Crusaders game starting their 7th inning at 8:14pm with a 9-run differential on the scoreboard. That, combined with our home plate umpire unable to find his way back to the field for a significant period of time because he couldn’t find his glasses, meant first pitch wasn’t until just after 9:45pm (Atlantic Standard Time).
The SweatSox opened the scoring in the first inning after Mattingly Romanin hit his first NCBL HR, your standard Trillium no-doubter that may have derailed the LRT project for another couple of months. Eager to find this ball to add to his collection, Mattingly is off to Calgary, where the ball was most recently spotted.
We quickly fell behind 6-2, but eventually tied the game in the 4th after a wild pitch, an RBI-single from yours truly (I, Shaun Keay), and finally a clutch bases loaded 2-run double courtesy of Phil Leduc. With a newfound sense of hope & momentum, the SweatSox proceeded to immediately give up 3 runs, the difference in the game.
We almost had a full squad show up for the first time in years, save for Kent Johnston who made up a phantom injury about hurting his leg when a ball hit him in the head while stealing 2nd up-9 the other day. We know what he was really doing though:
What will be remembered about this game was that it was one when controversial calls were made by unanimous consensus between the two umpires and the two managers. SweatSox Authority Cory Bond was able to get a safe call on a stolen base overturned after a lengthy discussion with the officials, then later on Rocket Kingpin Thömas “T-Böne” Töll got a single to the light pole overturned to a ground rule double. This never would’ve happened in Kanata, or the Sportsplex, or Southgate, or Brewer, or Heritage, or Faulkner, or McCarthy, and especially not at the Morgan. We believe both calls were correct in the end, but boy did it take a while to get there.
Finally, shoutout to one of my two best friends: Josh Ramage, who made his 3rd start (and 4th pitching appearance) in 5 games so far this year. The Hero of Hydration picked up the no decision, pitching 4 innings of 6-hit 4-walk ball, while striking out 2.
Most impressively though, Ramage nearly got the reigning Tier 3 Batter of the Year Randy Upshall to quit baseball right then and there (or at least swap out of Tier 3 until the SweatSox drop down to 4).
For reasons unknown, there was no peanut party after the game, and without peanuts to occupy our mouths, we were forced to listen to Mark Bond talk. One of his ramblings was him admitting he had no idea who Don Mattingly, a distant relative of our very own Mattingly Romanin, was. We had to teach Cop all about The Hit Man, and how he:
- Played his entire 14-year career for the Yankees
- Was the Yankee captain right before Jeter
- Was a 6x All-Star
- Was a 9x Gold Glove winner
- Was the first left-handed throwing 3rd baseman to play in the Majors since the early 1900’s
- Once homered in 8 straight games
- Is the single season grand slam leader (6)
- Is the current Blue Jays bench coach and offensive coordinator
But most importantly:
- He once made contact on a 2-1 pitch at the same time the Jerry pilot was airing
- He was convinced by the Yankee Assistant to the Travelling Secretary to continue using his new batting stance until it stopped working
- He famously split his pants the day after the Yankees washed their new cotton uniforms. A truly unfortunate shame.
To be fair, Cop did know about the sideburns guy on the Simpsons, but only now realized that it was Donny Baseball.
Final SweatSox vs Rockets Notes/Thoughts:
- The White House Hyjinx is confirmed for July 26th, everyone in the NCBL is welcome to attend
- Conditioner > Shampoo > Conditioning
- If there’s one person who doesn’t need help buying beer, it’s Trevor
- Where are all the old SweatSox? On the bench.
- You don’t put somebody in the hot-corner-outfield on Leg Day, that’s just bad managing
- I can scoop with the best of them, I can’t jump 14 feet though
- Mattingly can bare-hand grab & throw with the best of them, the routine grounders not so much though
- Mark doesn’t eat at work, he goes to work to eat
- All the best porno’s start with a firefighter, mechanic, and a beefcake stuck in an elevator
- You can’t put a limit on Mark’s Cafe Latte’s, but if you did, it would be 2
- 90’s Tim’s was the shit, today it’s just shit
- The last Rocket standing was Rocket Raccoon in Dumpster #3:
NEXT UP: for the SweatSox is a match-up with the high scoring Coyotes Sunday night in the friendly confines of Kanata, Ontario.
#WONTHEHYJINX